The Little Book of Abuse
Jasmine BirtlesAges 12+
You've got clowns to the left of you, jokers to the right and you're stuck in the middle unable to shut them up. Well now you can with all the put-doen lines and smart comebacks in this book. If you're all stressed out and you've no one to choke, pick a line and use it next time you feel like you're just flypaper for freaks.
You'll find put-downs for men: 'I'm not your type. I have a pulse'; put-downs for women: 'Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?', and put-downs for any fool using up your air on this planet: ' I don't know what your problem is, but I'II bet it's hard to pronounce'.
Warning: Next mood swing: 6 minutes.